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A beautiful poem on Parenting by Kahlil Gibran

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Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts.

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.

For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.

Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;

For even as He loves the arrow that flies,so He loves also the bow that is stable

—Kahlil Gibran, “On Childrenfrom The Prophet

This poem rightly resonates the type of parenting I ‘try’ to achieve everyday. Kahlil Gibran’s message which, is so fair and true, tells us about  the disappointment  so many parents feel by how their children fare in their lives. The hurt parents feel, if the children are not up to the expectation of the parent which can only be true if some how the parents bought into the notion that they have some sort of a right/ entitlement over the children.

I try not to expect anything in return from my daughters and don’t believe taking care of them as an ‘investment’ for my old age. I try to not use the word ‘sacrifice’ pertaining to the choices I make regarding my career, vacation, free time, hobbies and things which I always wanted to do in my life, because in doing so it will somehow keep them in my debt and lead to unhealthy expectations. Moreover I try to find a balance in all these.  It’s the selflessness of parenting that gets me going every time.

The image of being bent so that my child can shoot forth into the world is the perfect metaphor for the way parenthood feels to me.

I just felt compelled to share this poem, as much for you as for me.

Kahlil Gibran (January 6, 1883 – April 10, 1931) was a Lebanese-American artist, poet, and writer of the New York Pen League.


*Thanks a lot for visiting my blog. Please do ‘★ LIKE’ the post if you found it to be useful.Your comments, suggestions, criticism and all opinions are very much appreciated. Please do write your queries in the Reply/comments section and I will try to get back to you asap.


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Precautions before posting baby pictures on social media

 
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Social mediaAuthor: Gauri Kshirsagar

In today’s world of instant social connectivity, it has become very easy to share special moments of our lives with our dear ones instantly. Who doesn’t like to share baby pictures and love to read the lovely responses from friends and family? Even though your intention of posting them on social media may be to just share them, but always remember it is very important to share them only under proper privacy settings so that they aren’t misused or fall into wrong hands. There have been a number of cases wherein the photos posted, have been illegally used for unethical practices like advertising, child trafficking etc.

Following are some dos and don’ts before posting your child’s photos on social media:

  1. Always use the privacy settings in posting any photographs. Share the photos with people you know. You can opt for “friends”, “friends except acquaintances” or “share it to a customized group of friends”, so that you are always aware with whom you are sharing your pictures.
  2. May be after a couple of days you can change the setting to “only me” and can allow viewing of the pictures to specific people whenever you want.
  3. Some photographs like “profile picture” or “cover photos” do not have privacy settings and are visible to public, avoid posting you kids photos here or post pictures without their faces without revealing their identity.
  4. If you own a page or a group on any social media, again avoid posting photos of your kids wherein their identity is revealed since these photos are viewed by thousands and you do not have control over their circulation. In this case you can also copyright them.

Then comes the question of the types of photos you share on social media. Do remember these photos belong to your child only he/she have a  right on them. When they grow up, they  may feel embarrassed by the photos you post now. Following are some points to keep in mind on the types of photos you post on social media:

  1. Nude or Bath time pictures: Refrain from posting any photo of your child partially or completely naked, like while he/she is bathing, playing with water, changing diapers, or general walking around the horse in undies! Steer clear of anything involving nudity, even if we are only talking about children here.  Unfortunately, what you think is a darling moment of your toddler, it may fall into the wrong hands, such as those of child pornographers.
  2. Potty training pictures: I know what a relief it it when your little one is finally potty trained, its time for a celebration. But posting a picture of him/her doing their business will only leave them red faced when they grow up. Remember pictures on the internet stay there forever.
  3. Pictures with friends: Sharing group photos of other kids, for instance in a birthday party or a picnic, requires the permission of the parents. Some parents may not like their kids private pictures splashed across social media without their knowledge.
  4. Pictures with unsafe or unusual activities: I have seen many parents posting pictures of their child with a beer bottle, a child thrown in air, unattended child near fireworks etc. I know these pictures may have been taken as fun but sharing them online opens you up for criticism and potential problems, since all the surrounding details may not be immediately evident upon first glance.
  5. Pictures which give details about your child’s  location: Do not share an address of the location of where your child goes to school, or classes, or even the playground he/she goes to play in the evening to unknown individuals. Always use privacy settings, you don’t know who might use this information for purposes other than what was intended
  6. Pictures with negative impact on the child: for example child shaming photos, or photos exposing his/her weakness or fears, tantrum photos etc it may have a very negative effect on your child’s self esteem.

To sum it up:

TOP  TIPS FOR SAFER SHARING ON SOCIAL MEDIA
Know your privacy settings

It is amazing how many parents leave on their Instagram location settings. Set your location settings to off if you do not want people to be able to figure out where you and your children live.

Only share with people who care

Ask yourself if all the people you’re sharing your photos with really want to see them and will they protect them in a way you would.

Explore private social networks

Private social networks offer a secure way to share the pictures of your children with your family and friends.

Do not make a social site your back up for storage.

Do not make a social medial account as your back up for photos. Try to back it up in a hard disk or a any other online file storage site


*Thanks a lot for visiting my blog. Please do ‘★ LIKE’ the post if you found it to be useful.Your comments, suggestions, criticism and all opinions are very much appreciated. Please do write your queries in the Reply/comments section and I will try to get back to you asap.


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